"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on."
Joe E Lewis.
"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza."
Dave Barry.
"I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it."
Rodney Dangerfield.
"You can tell German wine from vinegar by the label."
Mark Twain.
"I don't like people who take drugs... Customs men for example."
Mick Miller.
"Time is never wasted when you're wasted all the time."
Catherine Zandonella.
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